Causing a Ruckus on the Internet is New to Me... Be Gentle Please

I feel nervous about this blog... I don't usually write blogs like this. Here is why:

1. It is political (I rarely, or maybe even never, write in length about my political stance.. because of #2)

2. It could offend some people (because of recent conversations with people of differing views, I felt it on my heart to share my ideas)

3. In an extension to my #2 reason, people who may think I am talking directly about them (you know, the "You're so Vain" - Carly Simon Syndrome), may decide to start a blog war with me (Now I know what Mark Driscoll is always talking about... crazy bloggers! haha)

But either way, I will write... and I will post anyway. To stay in the theme of writing titles, followed by a list (I don't usually do that... too structured for random thoughts if you ask me! hehe), here I go...



Reasons I am okay with Obama's being elected, even thought I didn't vote for him:


1. God put him there

"Let everyone be subject to the governing authorities. For there is no authority except from God, and those that exist have been instituted by God." - Romans 13:1


2. As Christians, we are the LAST people who should be fearing what is happening now or what is to happen later. So if God put Obama as president, then this is all apart of His plan... and we know what happens at the end: Jesus wins!!

"Now when these things begin to take place, straighten up and raise your heads, because your redemption is drawing near." - Luke 21:28


3. Has anyone seen gas prices?? ;)


and 4.

The word... the one word that surrounded the entire campaign... to some people it is a motto... or others it is now a cuss word...

HOPE

To start with, I do see a danger in people looking to a man, a sinful man (like the rest of us), for the hope of this nation. Only one man could bring hope to all mankind and He did not sin and is coming back for us someday. Obama will fall short of being the true hope of this nation...

However, I see something new happening with people now that he has been elected. People do have a new sense of hope, and even responsibility, regarding their place here in the US.

I have been thinking about Obama's non-saluting gig. I will admit that it is iffy to me... especially since he is our president. But then I think about what the flag is SUPPOSED to represent... and then I look at our actually country, from two hundred years ago to today... Two VERY different things. So different in fact, that it is hard for me to be proud of where we came from and how not-far we actually have come. It makes me so sad what people have had to go through to get here (geographically even), what they have gone through to prove themselves (even just as a human being), and the things that still happen to people today. I am not at all un-patrotic. But I am just saying that for most people (who aren't white basically), this land has been anything but free.

And so, although I think that our president, of all people, should be saluting the flag, perhaps because of a man who doesn't salute, many people will... for the first time in their lives.

For the first time, people who felt like they have never had a voice in this country, do. They have someone as president who knows what it is like to be a minority and who wants to use that experience to right the wrongs and make sure that people really are being treated equally. There is now someone in a high place in the country who 'sympathizes' with the people. Hmmm... sounds familiar. Although it falls short of being close to any type of comparison, how could this be used to tell people about what Jesus has done for us? (Being someone who is preparing to do more work in the inner city someday, I think more and more about these types of things!) What would that mean to some one to be able to say now, "Just as Obama knows what it is like to be a minority in this country, on a much, much, MUCH larger scale, JESUS knows what it is like to be a human and He wants us to be with Him."

"For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need." - Hebrews 4:15-16


So overall, I think instead of just surviving these next four (or possibly eight) years, let's pray and think of ways that God could be using our new president to bring people to His Kingdom... that's what this whole silly little life here on Earth is all about anyway, right? :)

Beauty from Ashes

I feel like my blog is often filled with a lot of sadness, prayer requests, and updates... with hope, but sometimes even more sadness. I suppose though that if I can't be honest about what's happening in my life, then why bother at all... but I still worry... am I a negative Nancy?? I don't think so... God loves all our requests... especially if they are from a heart for Him.

"Give ear to my words, O LORD,

consider my sighing.

Listen to my cry for help,

my King and my God,

for to you I pray.

In the morning, O LORD, you hear my voice;

in the morning I lay my requests before you

and wait in expectation."

-Psalm 5:1-3

On to my 'update':

Tuesday, Drena had a miscarriage. She would have had a little boy. At that point, it was easier for Joey to let her go. Her organs are now being donated to help other people live.

Here is a picture of Drena (on the right) with my friend Cynthia:



A super neat part about all of this is I have gotten a lot of responses about wanting to donate to this family... whether it is gift cards, clothing, or money, people really want to help! I even received an email from a lady I don't know! I am not even sure how she received my email address to contact me but either way, she still felt God leading her to do something to help! So neat!!

I will most likely get to meet Joey and Hailey this weekend as a few of us are going over to their house to help clean and unpack (they were in the process of moving during this last week.) Be praying for this time! Also, Joey is going to need a nanny soon for Hailey so he can go back to work after the holidays. We also need prayer that strong Christian men will step up to walk along with Joey during this tough time and also to encourage him in his walk with God.

Overall, (and here comes my 'positive Polly' attitude!) I am really excited to see what God is going to do through all of this! He is already bringing people together and showing His power as He provides for this family through the body!

Hailey... what a cutie:

Prayers needed and a chance to show Christ's love‏

The past few days, some sad information has been passed around for prayer. I received the following email today regarding the events and asking for our help. This would be a great opportunity for the body of Christ to step in and show our support and love. At the very least please be praying for this family.


"Hi everyone,

So it seems like tragic events always happen around Christmas time, for some reason. As many of you know, my friend Drena (who is only 34) was taken to ICU on Friday and declared dead on arrival.

2 days before, she had really bad headaches but was sent home the 2 times she went to the emergency room. Early Friday morning, her husband heard a thump in their bathroom and ran in to find Drena on the floor and not breathing.

Once she was checked into ICU, she was in a coma and deemed brain dead. This is not only tragic because of her age, but it was a freak thing. She had a cyst growing in her head that no one knew about. It was collecting fluid and putting pressure on her brain.

Drena is also 14 weeks pregnant. Although Drena is clinically dead, her baby's heart beat is still strong and the OB doctor still feels he/she is viable. Joey, Drena's husband, is now faced with the horrific decision of pulling the plug or allowing the baby to continue to grow within Drena for another 10 weeks in order to give the baby a 'meager chance'. There are no guarantees that Drena's body will continue to support the baby.

To make this even worse, Drena has a 15 month old daughter named Hailey. When I saw Hailey on Saturday, I realized that her shoes where a whole size too small and her poor little feet were shoved into them. I asked Joey if she had any other shoes....turns out Hailey lost 1 shoe to the only pair she had left that fit.

I started realizing that Joey was now going to be a single father and he will need lots of help from people that know and don't know him. If any of you have small daughters and have clothes/shoes that have been outgrown and you are willing to donate, please let me know. If you don't fit into that category, but would like to help with funds toward a Target gift card, we would be very thankful.

Joey is an unbeliever and this is the perfect opportunity for him to see the love and support of believers in Christ.

Please pray for this family and for their guidance....and if you have donations (of any kind), please let me know.

~Heather"


Please let me know if anyone has a donation to be made and I will pass it on to Heather. I never had the opportunity to meet Drena but I will look forward to the day when we will meet. Thank you so much for your prayers everyone!

My favorite song...

In only 20 Days, 6 Hours, 13 Minutes...

I will be 25 years old...

That is One Quarter of a Century!

I have already found gray hairs, I may have to go to the chiropractor for the first time for back pain, and... I could spontaneously combust at any given moment...

Ok... so I am not getting weird with thinking I am super old or anything like that...

BUT!! What in the world have I done with my life so far? Have I taken any chances for Christ? Why does my 20 page application for World Impact sit on my desk with only 3 pages sloppily completed? And when I get to heaven, what more is going to matter besides being with Jesus with the rest of my family, many of whom God could use me to bring into His kingdom?

Why am I so scared to just take a step? Just a step... not even a big one... just A step...

Time is Ticking!

Me and My Stubbornness... Thank goodness for Grace!

I have come to realize that God doesn't change... ok wait, that wasn't the realization; that's a given. But what I realized is that something God tells you to do years ago, He still continues to tell you... until you finally decide to listen...

Rewind six years (wow! Six years!) when I went to the inner city for the first time. I was going to HIU and we had to do so many hours of service per semester so a group of us went down to the Dream Center in Echo Park. From there, they split us onto teams and sent us on buses with food, clothing, and an eagerness for the unexpected. My team was sent to a hotel where many people lived there, in a one bedroom with their many children. They were happy and grateful for our visit regardless of their living situation. From that moment, I already knew I needed to be apart of the lives of people on the street.

The next time we went, we were put on a bus to Imperial Courts... a public housing project in Watts. The crips erupted here, the bloods in another housing projects just a few blocks from there, and part of "Training Day" was filmed there to make it more "realistic"... thank you Hollywood having the open eyes to see the state of the city, but doing nothing more than exploiting the people...

eh, anyway...

I really loved it there. I never was able to make it back to the Dream Center while I was at HIU but I often thought about the people living there in the projects. In the years to pass I often took part in homeless outreach opportunities but being there once a week at the most wasn't enough for me. I knew eventually I would want to live in the inner city. I often told people that too... "If money was no option, I would live in LA and be with the people full time."

I kept making excuses though for not doing it. I needed to finish my degree first. I would have no way of supporting myself. I had to finish paying on my car. I have to save up enough money first. All stuff that made sense to me, and even to people who I told, but over all... all excuses! All excuses to hide the fact that really... it wasn't that I didn't have the money, the degree, or the lack of car bills, etc... it was all a lack of faith in God that He can do anything and that if He has given me a passion for his people, I need to go for it! No matter what!!

A few months ago I started going to the Dream Center on my own and, wouldn't you know it... they put me on the bus that sent me to Imperial Courts. I had the same feeling all over again that I had been ignoring so many years... "I need to be here! Every day!" I knew it wasn't enough for me to do what we were doing once a week... smile, hand person pineapple, tell them Jesus is all they need, and then disappear to my cushy home in Simi Valley as I complain that my laptop isn't working right. That would no longer do.

So all of that to get to this... I have quit school... and I am applying with World Impact to be an inner city missionary. And that's where I will close (even though there is SO much more detail to tell... ask me sometime how I came to the actual decision to quit school and how I learned about World Impact... God moves in crazy ways!)

I haven't told a lot of people about applying. I think because if it doesn't work out (or if I chicken out) I won't have too many people to keep me accountable to keep pressing or to be disappointed when my lack of faith kicks in again and I stall another six years. But I know I can't do that, so here I am! Push me guys! Don't let me drag my feet as God shows me where He wants me to go!


Here is a video that I keep watching... it is helping me stay focused on God's will... and mindful of my own selfishness...

I'm a doubting Thomas... Oh me of little faith...

In all the busyness, the excitement, and hustle and bustle... of life, I have to make a conscious decision to remember to update Rachel's progress... get ready... this is good!!!

To recap, it was ten weeks and two days ago that she was in the metrolink accident. She was rushed to USC medical center with a fractured skull, bleeding brain, fractured pelvis and ankle and major skin burns. We all wondered if she was going to make it. And when we became assured that she would live through this, we often pondered if she would speak, walk, or really, what quality of life she would have. We have seen her improve slowly, making responses by moving parts of her body, seeing her body heal, speaking every so often, and learning to eat on her own...

Last week, she walked 24 feet with a walker! Praise God!

Doubting Thomas me... did I think that would ever happen? Not really... I very much doubted her body would ever be capable of that again (Just being honest here)... but now.... Walking!! Talking!! She is such a miracle!!

Be praying for her continual healing. Along with the physical healing, also pray for emotional healing. She just found out during this last week about the accident so she has been pretty emotional lately. I am so thankful she doesn't seem to remember anything that happened that day, but after being in bed for ten weeks and counting, there will be a lot for her to deal with that she has missed. I am dreading the day she asks about Fennie.

God is good no matter what! He has already brought her through so much and I know He will continue to give her the strength to get through what comes her way!

"...the blind receive their sight and the lame walk, lepers are cleansed and the deaf hear, and the dead are raised up, and the poor have good news preached to them. And blessed is the one who is not offended by me." -Matthew 11:5-6

Blessed are the poor... no, really...

To make up for my long absence, I am going to blog again in the same week, GASP! I know, I know... a little crazy...

Anyway, I made a joke to a friend earlier (as I was telling him my situation which I am about to go into) that maybe I should blog about it... because that's what all the cool kids do... apparently... so here I am...

Fraud... ugly, ugly thing... leaves you feeling naked, unprotected, and handicapped. Yesterday, I logged onto my bank account and saw that it had been emptied clean (I think they even licked it!) due to some special device that steals peoples card information and PIN numbers. I was shocked... but strangely calm.

As awful as it is to have something like this happen, I feel a strange freedom. I cannot spend money, even if I wanted to. I have none to spend and even if I did, no working debit card to spend it. I am, in a very weird way, enjoying having to find creative ways to not need money... like using my old train pass to get to work or eating that soup in the back of the cupboard that I have been looking over for months. I realized that with everything I already have, there is very little need for me to run up to the store for something, go to a restaurant, go get gas, go get that cup of coffee (I am loving on the hot chocolate lately!), go see a movie (Mmmm... Books...), etc...

I feel free in knowing that I don't have to spend money. Even further, a freedom in depending on God for everything I need. Sure I might realize there is something I need, but that's where faith comes in and if I model Jesus' prayer of asking for my daily bread, why should I worry? I know I will be taken care of!

"Two things I ask of you;
deny them not to me before I die:
Remove far from me falsehood and lying;
give me neither poverty nor riches;
feed me with the food that is needful for me,
lest I be full and deny you
and say, "Who is the LORD?"
or lest I be poor and steal
and profane the name of my God." - Proverbs 30:7-9

Updates, Food, and Identity Crisis!

I realized (on my own and after having a few people question me on my 'absence') that I haven't blogged in a while! So here are some recent updates!

Rachel update:

She is doing better everyday. In this time (since my last update), she has started speaking and is becoming more aware of everything around her. She is no longer in intensive care, is now in the burn unit at USC, and will hopefully be move to the rehab center in Northridge soon!

Last week, her trach (opening in her neck) was removed and they started swallowing therapy which did not take long at all! In no time, she was eating soups and puddings and even spoon fed herself! God is so good!


Last Friday for work, we had a dinner over at our assistant controller's house in Pasadena. It was so much fun!

The following is the menu we received that morning to taunt us as we waited for the night to come:

Tonight, we drink & wet our appetite on:

Cocktails & Appetizers

Mixed Drinks, Wine, Beer & Soda
Cheese, Fruits & Nuts
Smoked Salmon w/ cream cheese & capers on toast
Grilled Jumbo Prawns w/ garlic butter sauce on toast
Baked Jumbo Scallops wrapped in smoked bacon
Prosciutto on sliced Tuscan melon

Tonite, we dine on:

Dinner

Pasta with clam sauce & mushroom & basil
Grilled Salmon with lime-cilantro sauce
Grilled Rib-eye steak marinated in "secret sauce"
Grilled Tri tip loin steak marinated in "secret sauce"
Steamed Asparagus & baby carrots
Creamed corn
Green salad

Dessert

Leche Flan
Fruit Tart
Coffee

Wow! I couldn't believe it! I felt like I should have been dressed up for such an occasion!

Here are some pics to highlight the evening:

Only a sample of what we ate that night! Mmmmm!

Two of the Chefs: Caesar and Cesar

Can't wait to eat!

Everyone else was posing... I was too busy eating I guess!

Hanging out in the "party" room

Chef #3: Susan, Caesar's wife

Flan makes us feel weird... but very good!

Diving into the dessert! Do you see that spread of food? Mmmm...

We all had tons of fun that night! Got to relax, do our best not to talk about work (so hard!) and enjoyed each others' company as well as the amazing food and beautiful weather!

By the way, for Halloween four of us decided to dress up like two of our coworkers (two dressed up as Kent, our supervisor, and two of us dressed up like Chuck). I dressed up as Chuck... How do you think I did? I, personally, can't see the difference between us! ;)

Anchor Misplacement

This last Sunday at church, Todd taught about how we can only put our trust, our anchor, in Christ. Everything else will fail, fade, go crashing down, or disappoint us. Especially lately with our economy, people are learning that their anchor has been placed in our government and even that was a misplacement of our trust. Our anchor can only be put in Christ.

"We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure. It enters the inner sanctuary behind the curtain, where Jesus, who went before us, has entered on our behalf"
- Hebrews 6:19-20

Since Sunday, many of us have beem mulling over this and considering what types of things we have put our anchor in that we shouldn't have.

I was reminded of this again as I was reading my new book. Keith Phillips, President of World Impact, wrote a book called Out of Ashes, describing the events of the LA riots and how the church was able to step up and use this as an opportunity to share Christ's love. The following is a description of the hopelessness of the events:

"The 1992 riots on the street of Los Angeles were the worst domestic disturbance in America since the Civil War. Mobs looted and burned 10,000 buildings without impediment from the police. Fires soared hundreds of feet into the air. Fifty-eight people died; 2383 were injured. Over $1 billion in property was damaged; $500 million in wages were lost and 3700 businesses were destroyed.

As I watched the destruction all around, despair overwhelmed me. I had an empty powerless feeling in my stomach. An angry mob ran down Vermont Avenue, where our office is located, breaking into countless buildings, looting and torching as they went. There was no authority to phone - we could do nothing to stop the violence destroying our community.

People who had put their security in anything, or anyone, other than the Almighty God discovered abruptly that their trust had been misplaced"

No one ever thinks our city will be destroyed, or that our government will fail us, or that a relationship will end, or that our money will run out, or that we may not have food on the table. Our anchor is often put in even the smallest things that give us the assurity of having life. Even that is all unpredictable and we can only put our trust in our salvation.

"For in this hope, we were saved." - Romans 8:24

Home

Fennie passed away at 12:29pm today. Although we are sad to not have her here with us, it is SO exciting to think of where she is now... she is with JESUS! She no longer has pain or is dealing with her earthly body... she is in heaven worshipping God!


Please be praying for her family.

Praise God!

Whoops! Been bad at updating this... especially with news about Rachel and Fennie... Here is the latest!

As of yesterday morning, Rachel was fully alert and responding to commands from her sister, Martha. She was able to shake and nod her head! The neck brace was taken off and the MRI revealed that her back was fine. She is on meds for any discomfort. BUT, they are looking at possibilities of moving her closer to Simi!

For Fennie, however, it has been a critical week. Her kidneys are failing and need to be working on their own. If they do, the doctors have a three month plan to get her healthy enough for the heart transplant list. If not, the doctors need to reevaluate her health at the end of this week. As of today, her kidneys, liver and pancreas are failing now. When asked if she wanted to live and fight this, she said "yes."















Praise God for his faithfulness! We have already seen the miracles He has done in Rachel. Be praying for Fennie as she fights on.

Light Vs. Dark

I had the weirdest experience tonight where God's reign in every one's life, Christian or not, became very real to me in a way I had never seen it before. I realized this reign can be shown in two ways... either we embrace His power and allow Him to control our lives, or we run from His power which causes fear and shame in our lives.

I was sitting on the metro subway on my way back to my car from Union Station. Before our train started to move, a man came and sat next to the man at the front of the car. He started talking to him, the man seemed disinterested, so he soon moved away once we started moving. He then went on to the next person on the train. I could hear faintly that he was telling him about some method of meditation. This method, whatever it is, is used by many celebrities, is cheaper than drugs or whatever, and it is meant to get rid of all stress. Say this odd chant once a day for fifteen minutes and all your stress will be gone.

As this man was talking to the second person, I realized this could be an awesome opportunity to share Christ with him. When he came to me and asked me if I wanted to know about whatever this method was called, that would be my chance to say "Sure! As long as I can tell you about Jesus also!" I then perked up in my seat, made room next to me by moving my purse to my lap, and made sure to have a friendly inviting smile that would tell this man, "Come talk to me!" He finished talking to the man, looked at me, then went to the person across the row from me.

"I am next," I thought as I then prayed more for a pure heart, to get rid of the pride of wanting to just prove him wrong, but instead show him the Truth. I had time to pray and purify my heart as the young boy he was talking to was very receptive to what he was saying and was even chanting along with him.

The man finished, looked at me as I smiled, and went to the next person sitting behind me.

He talked to everyone on the train but me. He talked to everyone, even those sleeping, reading, and with iPods blasting in their ears. Not to mention the apparent drug addicts and the just amazingly grumpy people who must have been held up at work late. He talked to them all not matter what type of wall they had up or no matter how non-receptive they seemed.

All of them except me. The one person who, from his pespective, really wanted to hear what he had to say. Why did he not talk to me? Does he even know why he didn't? I think I know...

"You believe that there is one God. Good! Even the demons believe that—and shudder." - James 2:19

Light scares those who live in darkness. Wow...

Think fast!

My sister refuses to believe that a blog can be written without hours and hours of contemplation. As she sits here beside me, I am composing a fantastic blog... I am sure of it. See Courtney? You, who hasn't written a blog in over a month, it is possible to write a blog...or a bloog... as you seem to think it is so funny to hit the keyboard as I write... It is possible to write a blog even with distractions!

... the end...

Love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!!!

Trusting in Jesus

Here is a more extensive update on Fennie that was recently emailed to me:

"Fennie was at Kaiser in Hollywood undergoing her scheduled surgery. It was her heart valve and ran into complications and transferred her to UCLA Medical Center. The complication was that they found out that her ventricle (Heart Chamber) was weak. The bottom line is that she will need a heart transplant. Currently, she is still in critical condition but stable.

The main focus now is to get her completely stable so she can be eligible for a donor. The process takes 3.5 weeks to 1.5 years to get one. Please continue to pray for her. She is currently on life support and her family is there with her."

Please continue to be praying for her and Rachel.

"Some trust in chariots and some in horses,
but we trust in the name of the LORD our God. " - Psalm 20:7

Prayer DOES Work!

Update on Rachel:

She is starting to wake up! She opened her eyes twice and even reached out for her sister yesterday! She also yawned a couple times too!

She is still in critical condition so keep praying.

There are some problems still getting a Visa for her oldest sister. Luckily, people in the church have friends on the city and state level to help get her approved and a phone call was made to the embassy of Lukasa, Zambia last night to plead her case. All waits on her Visa to get her here as God brought together the finances needed.


Update on Fennie:

She had complications during her surgery and was transferred to UCLA on Monday for a heart bypass which happened last night. Dave, our fearless leader, will be visiting her this morning so I should have more of an update later today. Thank you for your prayers. I truly believe she is well taken care of at UCLA... and even more by God! :)


Thank you everyone again for the prayers! It has already felt like such a long journey but I know it will all be in God's timing for the complete healing of these two awesome sisters!

A Reason to Share My Life with Internet Strangers

Well, here it is. After much kicking and screaming, Jen Unander has a blog... and apparently refers to herself in third person. Wow... what a start!

I finally agreed to having one after this last week when some things in my life and in the lives of my Christian brothers and sisters got a little turned upside down. Prayers have been requested (and answered!) but sometimes facebook isn't the most convenient for much detail, so getting a blog proved to be a practical decision.

So to start all this off, I will bring up two important prayer requests.

The first is for my dear friend Rachel.

Rachel is an exchange student from Zambia who has been here for a year or two. She was in the first car of the Metrolink accident last week, suffered a cracked skull and pelvis and skin lacerations.

She was rushed to the USC trauma center immediately following the crash. Through last weekend, she had a few brain surgeries to stop the bleeding in the brain and reduce swelling. She was in a 72 hour medical coma. As the days have gone, her swelling has gone down and she had a fever at one point... a good thing because it means her body is fighting. Monday, as she was brought out of her coma, she responded on command by wiggling her toes, squeezing hands and helping the nurse by lifting her arm. She has experienced some other minor complications but God in His faithfulness has only been using these to show His glory even more as He pulls her through... and all the while pulling the rest of us closer to Him and each other.

I had the opportunity to spend some time with her on Friday night as her family was being ministered to at church. My new and lovely friend Lena and I got to read cards to her from some of her classmates. During that time we saw her as she readjusted her arm, stretched her neck, and reacted to the touch of the nurses. She is slowly becoming more aware of what is going on around her.

Keep her in your prayers as she continues to heal. Also pray for her family. We hope to have her sister come here from Zambia this week if all goes well.


The second prayer request is for our friend Fennie. I don't know a lot of the details about this but she will be going into open heart surgery tomorrow. Please pray God's hand is on her and guiding the hands of the doctors.


"Naked I came from my mother's womb,
and naked I will depart.
The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away;
may the name of the LORD be praised."
-Job 1:20


Finishing my first blog. Signing out. Oh and more to come on the car crash and Lima Beans... I know it was invigorating!

New Blog

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